The end of 2018 is approaching, and I am so ready for this! Not because I didn’t fully enjoy 2018, as it was amazing, full of fun, love, growth and change. I’m ready because an immense change just clicked for me and I love a fresh start!
I realize you can create a fresh start at any moment, and I embrace that, I often teach it in my classes. But there is something symbolic to me about a new day, week, month or year.
This year showed me how much I still continue to give myself away. I tell myself I’m doing so much better, but in reality I still have a long way to go. I’ve somehow worked back up to maintaining 3 jobs plus side gigs, and even though I schedule down time, I don’t take it.
You see, when it comes to the end of my workday, I desire nothing but a hot drink, some calm music and a long, deep yoga practice.
Yet 30 minutes later after arriving at home I get pulled into laundry, re-organizing my closets, making to-do lists that are “neater” than the identical ones I’ve already made, literally digging for anything to sort out so that I avoid the biggest mess of all: Sorting out myself.
I clean because it’s easier, its instant gratification and accomplishment, and it helps to avoid sitting with myself. I like myself, I do. I am proud of my drive, strength and energy. But I don’t love myself enough yet.
I had a brick-load of emotions hit me last Sunday, completely out of the blue. I had a great day, walking dogs, hiking and watching TV.
But, what always comes after Sophie completely takes the day off? Struggle! Emotions! Pain! The pain of sitting with myself because my mind tells me I could have been doing countless other things to stay busy! And when I try to find the root of this mindset, the root of my strength and drive, it comes back to fear.
I have fear of falling behind, fear of not being enough, or being disliked, fear of failure. There are many attributes I grew up with that laid the groundwork for these patterns, but you know what I’m working on now?
Being grateful for the good AND the bad.
I watched Tony Robbins movie “I am Not Your Guru” on Netflix the other day, and he said “If you blame a person for the bad, you have to blame them for the good too, because it’s made you what you are today.” And as I mentioned above, I love my drive and passion. This quote resonated with me so much, completely changing my perspective for the source of many lessons in my life.
Without the fear I’ve learned to operate from, I may not be as motivated of a person. I may be a sheep among sheep. So many what-ifs produced from the possibility of a different path being chosen. When I try to imagine life any other way, I always find gratitude for the life I have now, struggle and all.
With these realizations, comes a list of intentions to bring into my life.
1- Self care, above all else. Come home and do yoga first. Wake up and meditate first.
2 – More mantra practice.
Mantras are proven to resonate with specific chakras and frequencies, loosening up any grips, or igniting any dormant energy. They also help to quite the mind, starting our day with a clear head, or sending us to sleep with everything quiet and peaceful. I will be using mantras for self-love and clarity.
3- Use the 80/20 rule.
Focus more on the 20% of tasks that make the biggest impact upon 80% of my life and business.
I often find myself ignoring the vital 20% in leau of the trivial 80% of tasks that are much easier, but don’t use my time most effectively. I will often try to prep as much as I can, be it food, to-dos, clothing for certain events, whatever! I keep thinking my future self will thank me, but I don’t save time, I don’t slow down enough to celebrate any little wins I created for myself, and continue the cycle of “do this and do that to free up more time.
Nope. Done with that cycle.
4 – Focus on what serves me best. Say no MORE.
Less side-gigs that don’t serve as a catalyst to my finances. Less agreeing to events at times I’m not comfortable with. Less fitting in 5 events per day. Less 12 hour workdays. MORE calling in and manifesting what will serve my dharma in this life. The universe is a mirror, and the reflection I’m building is becoming stronger and stronger every day, with serendipitous moments and thoughts becoming reciprocated. (Just the other day, I laid out 4 crystals and pronounced “fire, water, earth and air” while laying them out for yoga. Just a moment later, a girl in a bathroom said the SAME THING. Send it out = get it back.)
Amazing things are coming everyone, and I hope this post inspires you to call in more of what we all deserve.
The best.
Thank you for reading, share if you liked it, and I will write again soon!
YogiSophie
